Life.
I have been doing a lot of thinking about my life recently; where I am, what I want from life etc. Up until now everything has just been this big game to me - I still feel like I’m 16 years old when the truth is that I’m 22. There are so many things that I should be able to do by now but because I don’t take life seriously I’ve never completed things that other people my age have. The only responsibility that I have is work - counting £1000s of pounds daily and opening or closing the shop. Not really impressive, is it?
Other people my age have been able to drive for 5 years, have their own cars and houses - heck some people I went to school with are now parents, married and in some cases, dead (ok, that’s not what I want from life but that’s where we all end up so I suppose it’s inevitable).
I can’t even manage 4 weeks worth of wages, you can guarantee that by week two I’m all out of money, granted half my wages go straight to my mum to pay back my debt to her but that still leaves me with £100 a week to myself, and it goes all too quickly. I might want to grow up and buy a car and have children (oh, and pay for everything else that goes with them..food, clothes,a crib, crib bedding, toys, pram, high chair) but if I can’t even manage to survive a month when all I have to pay is my bus ticket then what chance do I have?
So I’ve set myself a goal, after having a really long hard thing about this. I’ve managed to cut my smoking down to around 15 a day, but I want to get this down to 10 and then 5 and the none. The money that I save on cigarettes is going into my ISA. Well, most of it anyway. That means that when I pass my driving test, which should be within the next 6 months), I’ll have a bulk of money to either pay a deposit on a new car or buy an older one outright. Failing that, it’ll be used for a deposit on a flat. I’ve given up the thought of living with the boyfriend and I’ve worked out that in one years time I’ll have paid off all my debts so any money I have left I can spend on moving out or a car, or both.
I’m hoping to be living on my own again within 18 months - with or without the boyfriend living with me. I actually managed really well when I moved out of my mum’s house before until I lost my job but I have about 95% job security where I am at the moment and the only place I can go is up - and with that comes better wages.
My plan is that if I write about it here then I can’t give up saving and moving towards my goals - that is the idea anyway. I’m sure I’ll stick to it.
